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Rädslor

Posted by Anneli on 30 maj, 2012 in DayByDay |
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Veckans R.L med Yohanna handlar om vad jag räds.

Jag försöker vara kontrollerad men i bland funkar inte hjärnan
som jag har tänkt utan släpper allt och jag blir helt ”lealös” och
det händer när jag hamnar inom sjukhusväggarna.
Jag har beskrivit det här –>>

Jag hamnar i någon slags trans och allt som händer är utan
min kontroll och det är läskigt! Jag blir som en liten rädd
unge som vill sitta i mammas knä.

Det är inte samma sak som att gå till tandläkaren. Det
har jag inga problem med fast jag hade en vidrig tand-
läkare under min skoltid, som höll fast en i ett järngrepp
och släppte inte borren förrän han var klar.
Nu har jag haft samma tandläkare i 30 år som jag besöker
1 ggr/år och hon är super duktig.

Höjder och mörker är inga problem för mig konstigt nog.
Är lite förvånad själv faktiskt.

Däremot kan jag INTE titta på skräckfilmer!
Eller spännande filmer som t e x Hamilton med Persbrant
Därför sitter jag här och skriver istället.
Det är nog för jag lever mig in i filmen så mycket. Jag far
som ett skållat troll mellan soffan och köket och kan inte
sitta still. Så bio och skräckfilmer fungerar inte för mig.

Mina barn tycker att jag är skitlarvig för jag inte fixar det
men hur jag än har försökt så finns det inga planer att jag
går ur det utan att ha fått andnöd minst ett par gånger.

En annan rädsla jag har är att det kan hända mina nära o
kära något. Jag har försökt att släppa lite på det med åren.

Summan av kardemumman är väl att jag inte är riktigt så
hårdnackad att jag tror mig klara av allt fast jag har några
år på nacken. Jag har lite kvar att lära.

 

 

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